


To Live, To Die {Naegiri}

by Kookie_Krumbs



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School
Genre: AU, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluffy Angst, LET THEM BE HAPPY KODAKA, Naegiri - Freeform, angsty fluff, badly written because i started crying in the middle of writing hohoho, kirigiri didn't deserve this, let them be together, save my babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-27
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-17 04:43:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8130854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kookie_Krumbs/pseuds/Kookie_Krumbs
Summary: [DR3 Future EP 11 AU] Kirigiri Kyouko is alive, even if her life is already slipping through her fingers.(My take on Naegi's despairing visions.)





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [denkitenshi12](https://archiveofourown.org/users/denkitenshi12/gifts).



> guys you don't even understand  
> i was filled with so much despair while writing this  
> i cried while writing it  
> and bcs of that i rushed the ending bcs my heart hurt  
> //WEAK
> 
> anyways, big thanks to denkitenshi12 for giving me this lovely prompt!!  
> "how bout a DR3 episode 11 AU wherein Kirigiri lives and the effects of Cure W wear off just in time for her to see Naegi screaming and about to kill himself, or she dies and the next thing she knows, she's inside Naegi's mind, watching as her former classmates and another version of herself tells Naegi to commit suicide and she stops him? Either one is fine I just really wanna see how you'll interpret this one!!"  
> -denkitenshi12
> 
> bro i want to stab you but hug you at the same time--  
> (any feedback or new prompts would be appreciated, guys!)

**_Passing the 4th time limit with Naegi Makoto alive._ **

The bold red words flash mockingly and circulate around Kirigiri’s wrist teasingly.

A nauseous wave stabs her in the gut.

“What’s the matter, Kirigiri-san?” Naegi inquires in his reassuring and hope-ridden voice. His voice soothes her; it keeps her calm and serves as her anchor.

“The time limit is almost up.”

All eyes are on her, but Kirigiri can only see Naegi and her wristband.

 ** _Passing the 4th time limit with Naegi Makoto alive.  
_** It reminds her.

Kirigiri gulps down the fear and despair that leave a bitter taste in her mouth.

“Naegi-kun.” She mutters his name stoically, building an inner wall against the waves of anguish and sorrow that threaten to escape.

Naegi blinks, his curious emerald eyes attempting to search her unwavering amethyst orbs. He detects determination and melancholy in her eyes and doesn’t search any further because he’s distracted, knowing that the woman before him could disappear when he wakes up. His fingers itch to hold her scarred hands like before, but he suppresses the urge by balling his hands into fists. He believes in her and has faith that _she will return to him, alive._

“No matter what happens,” She can’t tell him. A despairing image of her face dyed in purple flashes through her thoughts and she intercepts it with their past hopeful memories of making garlands together, “don’t give up on hope.” The situation has made her painfully aware: hope is more important than her own desires. Though her heart may twist and her scars may ache, she doesn’t allow herself to entertain her sorrow. “I will always be by your side.”

The words catch Naegi off-guard. First he’s confused, then he settles into a warm smile. He realizes, after spending years together, that Kirigiri works hard to keep his hopes up. Doubt is unnecessary. Trust fills in all of the blanks and Naegi nods without question. “Yeah. I’ll do what I can.” And with Kirigiri by his side, he can do anything. “We won’t lose. We can’t lose!” Not when they have each other.

_Ding dong, ding dong._

Time is up.

Kirigiri’s amethyst eyes flicker down to the flashing red NG code that sets her apart from the other three in the room.

 ** _Passing the 4th time limit with Naegi Makoto alive.  
_** It taunts her.

Mitarai is the first to the floor, closely followed by Asahina. Kirigiri distinguishes the order through ruffles of clothing, unable to pull her eyes away from the forbidden code that would inevitably steal her life. For once, Kirigiri finds herself trembling lightly.

Naegi yawns in front of her and collapses, his ahoge aiming directly at her. Kirigiri gazes upon his collapsed form, drinking in every detail, and considering that every second could be their last together. She recalls their times together at the office, bickering merrily and stealing each others’ packets of coffee. She recalls slipping into his bed after a horrendous nightmare to feel his fingers earnestly smooth through her hair, treating each and every strand with care. She recalls the feeling of holding his hand, his fondness consoling her scars in waves and his smile warming her heart.

Both contentment and sleeping drugs shoot through Kirigiri’s veins and she falls to her knees. The brown head of hair in front of her begins to multiply and reminds her that the time limit is up. Just before the fatigue completely possesses her, Kirigiri gulps down the last **hope** she has left :  Cure W.

 **_Kirigiri Kyouko passes the 4th time limit with Naegi Makoto alive.  
_ ** _Hope was the last thing to ever flow through her veins._

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

But her eyes open.

The color of death and despair surrounds her. Instantly, her detective instincts inform her that she isn’t alive. Blood isn’t flowing through her veins and another vein is forever protruding from her delicate pale face. She cannot reach to feel it, because she cannot move. Every inch of her body is immovable and she finds that she cannot even control her own lips. Only her eyes are under her control; she utilizes them by glancing around her, at the swirls of despair that were once apparent in everyday life.

But then she sees Maizono Sayaka.

Had she been alive, Kirigiri’s blood would have run cold.

“Why did you let him do it, Kirigiri-san?”

Her smiling face is a lie.  
None of it makes sense.

“Why do you get to live happily with Naegi-kun, while I’m left behind?”

It’s all so scary. So unfair.

“But wait, you aren’t living anymore. You’ve joined me.”

_What?_

“You’re **dead**.”

.  
.  
.  
.

Kirigiri can’t scream.

“K-Kirigiri-san?”

Kirigiri has heard that voice before, a voice infused with endless hope. Inside, the detective desperately attempts to move herself, but to no avail. Her limbs refuse to respond to her and instead provide her with the utmost pain. As much as she desperately wants to warn the familiar voice in front of her, she can’t. She can’t do anything. Now that she’s dead, she can’t help him anymore. She can’t comfort him in the same way. She can’t hold his hand and reassure him that everything will be alright. That she will be by his side.

“Naegi-kun. You’re still alive?”  
Those aren’t her words.

Naegi’s face morphs into one of horror and he turns to face her. For once he’s horrified when seeing her, and Kirigiri hadn’t thought it would shred her apart. But it does; her nonbeating heart aches and tears lick at her eyes. She desperately wants him to understand her hopes, but he doesn’t because Maizono has already spoken.

“You swore you’d get me out of the school, right?”

A hopeless, despairful, unbelieving breath escapes Naegi.  
More of his breath is stolen when Kirigiri unwillingly speaks.

"It’s your fault.”

“I-!” Naegi attempts to explain himself; Kirigiri already knows his answers. But they both experience the same terror as their deceased classmates gather around all of them, each with a blameful expression and the same aura of despair emanating from them.

Kirigiri wants to warn him not to look. He deserves none of it. The tears welling up in his eyes are enough to motivate her. Every last centimeter of her strength is poured into her lips. She hopes. She desperately hopes with all of her willpower that she can help him one last time. She wants to. She _needs_ to.

Finally, she can move her lips.

“Why are you alive?”

But the wrong words had escaped.

Maizono follows with the same despair.

“Why are you alive, Naegi?”

“Naegi-kun."  
They begin in unison.

“You should have died…”

Tears and blood are streaming down Kirigiri’s face. No. No, NO! This isn’t what she wants him to know. She doesn't want to see his face dyed in despair!

“... Instead of…”

Kirigiri harshly bites her tongue.

Maizono is the only one who continues the despair.

“...Us,” A singular voice mutters.

_Kirigiri can finally move._

Naegi freezes, his despair-filled eyes focused on Kirigiri who has been reduced to a mess of coughing and heavy breathing. Time freezes around them and everyone vanishes, leaving an echo of Maizono’s giggle, them, and the despair.

“K-Kirigiri-san… That’s you, isn’t it? It’s really you, right?”

Kirigiri nods her head affirmatively, wiping away a trail of blood that had trickled down her chin. “Yes, Naegi-kun. It’s me. The real me.”

Nonetheless, despair swirls through his eyes. “Y-You’ve got that wrong. You’ve passed, haven’t you? I saw your NG code, and it was all my fault. It can’t be you! I tried to--!” He’s hysterical; that much is obvious.

“It’s me, Naegi-kun.” Kirigiri clasps his hand, relief instantly washing through her body. She can feel his physical form; she can hold his hand like always. She can reassure him one last time. She can provide him with one last hope.

The despair wavers; the swirls halt and rewind, then fastforward. Naegi is clutching onto her hand, although he is stepping back simultaneously. “Kiri...giri...san..” Tears are streaming down his face. His form trembles and his fingers struggle to reach her while his arms inch away.

It doesn’t take a detective’s work to understand his battle. Kirigiri slips her arms around his shoulders, greeting his warmth with her coldness. Hot tears soak her shoulder and advise her that the despair has escaped him. A smile adorns the detective’s features. “I recall that I warned you to always believe in hope.”

“I’m so sorry, Kirigiri-san. Your death was all my fault. Why didn’t you say anything?” Naegi can barely speak between words, his voice cracking and fading off altogether. He could hardly hold himself together, though he was holding onto Kirigiri with all his might. “I.. I…”

“You would do something reckless.” And she absolutely owes him for sacrificing himself at Hope’s Peak Academy. Had it not been for his unwavering trust in her, she wouldn’t have been granted the bliss of holding his hand and burying her face into his hair like this.

Naegi hiccups and finally releases her, wiping his tears with his sleeve. He ceases his trembling and his hope-filled orbs focuses on the lavender that compliment the purple dotted on her skin. “I would do anything for you. So please, come back so we can fight despair together.”

“I am dead, Naegi-kun. I cannot.”

“You never were and still aren’t tactful.” Naegi replies with a bitter smile, his fists balling up.

“Yes, but I will always be by your side.”

“How? You won’t move or smile anymore. You won’t come to my room in the middle of the night and you won’t share my coffee with me anymore.” Tears sit on the edge of Naegi’s eyes, the despair of Kirigiri’s death beginning to soak in even further. “And.. I can’t hear your voice anymore..”

“It’s unlike you to be so pessimistic.”

“Can you blame me…? I.. I love you, Kirigiri-san.”

_And I wish you were still alive._

Naegi wishes he had truly realized before her death. He can admit his feelings now because he’s convinced that Kirigiri should have known. Even Munakata knew. Naegi desires to have seen the blush spread across her cheeks and the adorable smile that he had complimented so many years ago. If this is the last time he will see her, then he wants to tell her. Moreso because she will be gone when he awakens.

His wishes are acknowledged and his luck assists him. Kirigiri’s cheeks are dyed red and she smiles wistfully. “I love you too, Naegi-kun.”

They can’t be together after Kirigiri’s death,  
but in this moment, they can live together.

Naegi caresses her purple cheek, his emerald eyes cautious and wandering around her face. He observes the pink lips he could never kiss, the warm eyes he would forever miss, and the lavender he should always cherish.

When he imagines a life without her, Naegi loses himself.

Their lips brush together and lock into a gentle, loving kiss. Naegi sheds tears, perceiving the sorrow and affection that Kirigiri pours into the tender movements of her lips through contact alone. He tastes blood and squeezes her tight. He doesn’t want this moment to end. He almost despairs at the thought of losing her, but hopes again knowing that they will always remember this moment, just the two of them.

When they separate, lips lightly grazing against each other for the first and last time, Naegi finds it in himself to smile at her. “I will never forget you, Kirigiri-san.”

The feeling is mutual, but Kirigiri isn't alive and doesn't allow herself the luxury of greediness.  
“I will always be by your side.”  
Trapped in that moment, she will always watch over him.  
Cure W has kept Kirigiri alive, but only in spirit.  
It allowed her to fulfill her promise of staying by his side,  
even if it is within his **despair**.

_The last time Naegi sees Kirigiri, she’s smiling and alive._

Naegi returns to reality still tightly restricted by rope, his eyes overflowing with hope. Monokuma’s knife remains exactly where it had fallen underneath the monitor and Juzo’s firm footsteps approach.

“Naegi Makoto?”

Naegi flashes him a warm smile: one without the intent of self-harm. One that reflects the acceptance of his losses. One that explains his absolute determination to remove despair from everyone alive. One that carries all of his love for Kirigiri Kyouko.

* * *

  ** _Kirigiri Kyouko passed the 4th time limit with Naegi Makoto alive.  
_****_And she still lives on in spirit._**


End file.
